Middle Stall

The women's restroom at work is down the hall from my office suite. All the offices on this floor share the restroom. There are only three stalls, but that's fine, because the aren't too many people on this floor. It's rare to see more than one other person in there at one time, but today there were three of us with business to do at the same time.

While it was clear when we all entered the restroom that none of us knew each other, I did recognize one of the women as the Crazy Lady Who's Obsessed with Dogs. She's an odd one, this woman. Whenever I have a puppy-in-training at the office with me, I actively look to avoid her in the lobby and hallways and restroom because I don't want to get into a twenty-minute conversation with her. Once, she came into my workplace and asked to see me, just to visit the dog. So focused is she on the dog that she doesn't recognize me when I'm without one.

Crazy Lady always uses the handicap stall in the bathroom. Always. Even if there's someone in there and the other two stalls are empty. She waits by the wall until it's free, and will freely mention that that's what she's doing. She is not -- by any physical indication anyway -- handicapped.

So I was in the middle stall, Normal Lady was in the stall to my left, and Crazy Lady in the handicap stall to my right. Normal Lady emitted a slight gas-passing sound, as one is wont to do while sitting on the toilet. And Crazy Lady said, at full volume:

"My sentiments exactly."

Wow.